Exodus
Gay Pride Festival, Clapham Common,
1996
I remember, chiefly, that shocking
light,
how we squinted up from the earth,
bleached by the very summer that
floored us –
how through that light emerged those
thin-armed
boys from my class, proclaiming
themselves
the heralds of memory, even that one
I’d hit for calling me queer. Now
our lustrous presence was all the proof
required. We sucked at cans of Red
Stripe,
lounged in glare like exiles thrown
on a luminous shore, scuffing at it,
heel by heel, until the dust
threw up another move. Come
to think, we already had the people
we needed – hawkers of ironic
T-shirts and merchants of the old
religion, saving us all in brand new
drag. But then someone was grabbing
the mic. A thousand balloons cut loose
from their net, a pulsing vermilion
arc, while men made little huddles
of grief in twos and threes, their
faces
tight with fat and beautiful tears.
I stalked to the edge of the crowd,
chippy
as some lad who just missed out
on the war. A whole new country was set
before me, refusing to be ignored.